A Sad Day...

From our family to theirs, with love...

We all knew that this day would come, the day that we would have to say good-bye to Sa. The 3 families that cared for him the past few months came together with his new family and we had a small (last minute) send off party for him. I think that it was good for him to see all of us working together as a team on his behalf. His new family fit right in, it was like they were always here - funny how God works like that. I had been asked a few times if I felt that this was the best for him, and I truly did think that...and now I know that it is the best for him after meeting his new family. Don't get me wrong, I offered to hid him in my basement and tell people he ran away...he considered it, but ended up deciding to go with his new family.

It was really hard to let him go! I am just glad we said our goodbyes on Saturday night, not Sunday morning...that would've been too much. We all held it together (for Sa's sake)...that is until little Ky said goodbye and began whimpering. I think I would've rather the all out crying to the whimpering. It was just a sad little face with quite tears rolling down her cheeks and every now and again her shoulders would shrug. Well, that was enough to get all the adults in the room going. Once we got her into the car, she just kept saying, "I don't want Sa to leave." We agreed but explained that sometimes we have to follow God's plan even if we don't agree. A hard lesson for one so young to learn.

I know that we were only with Sa a few months, but he had a huge impact on our family. We all bonded with him, and I think once you bond, it really doesn't matter how long you were together, it still really hurts. Ky and Kd have really never lost anyone before, so this is also really hard on them. In addition to processing my own grief, I have to help explain it to them why Sa had to go. Kb and Kp need us in a totally different way. I need to reassure them that they will not be going anywhere, that we are their forever family. All of these are so hard for them to understand. I heard it said that our grief cannot compare to others...well, maybe not, but we loved him dearly and had to let him go. So maybe ours cannot compare, but I would like to see them explain that to my children. To put some perspective on it: Kp and Kb have only been with us one more month than Sa, and I cannot imagine giving them up at this point...that is how much it hurts to see him go, although he is going to live with a wonderful family :-)

There are so many things that we will miss about Sa...most of all his beautiful smile (which he dutifully maintains with thorough brushing with clean toothbrushes :-) )